Monday, January 08, 2007
In a Boy's Shoes
I had an interesting experience over the weekend that I thought was worth writing about. Beware, I believe writing of this type has not been seen before on Red Confectionery...!
I was out with two guy friends of mine who happen to be gay. We had a few drinks at home and then proceeded to go to a local bar that is, shall we say, frequented by a more colourful crowd. Very fun, very loud and very interesting. Especially this night. I am not a Bisexual or a Lesbian, but then I don't go to bars to get laid either.
As it turned out, my two guy friends decided they quite liked the look of each other so I was left relatively alone. No worry, I had run into a few old friends anyway - always a surprise when you see people from high school in a gay bar - and decided to make friends with the people sitting next to us.
I saw this girl with a nice red top on, and complimented her on it.
Tip #1 in making friends with girls: Compliment on clothes and appearance, even if you don't want to shag them.
Actually, the top was OK but it's always a good conversation starter. Then I realised, Shit. I'm in a gay bar. You don't make friends here, you make 'friends.' And THEN I realised, Hey. This could go somewhere...
Girl in the red top happened to be very nice looking, and by chance we had a few things in common. Like me, she was a science student studying away from home. We chatted about this and that... I won't bore you with the details. But she did ask me - God bless homosexuals for being straight up - whether or not I was a Lesbian. I lied, and said I was Bi. I wanted to try this out.
I decided to be the man of the situation and bought her a drink. Midori and Lemonade, of course.
Tip #2 in making friends with girls: If they don't specify what drink to buy, get them something sweet and girly like a Midori and Lemonade, Mallibu and Pineapple or Vodka Lemon and Lime.
One drink led to another - my guy friends were delighted with this and encouraged my bi-curiousity by buying us more drinks. We ended up outside the ladies together. I didn't know whether or not to go in with her, which is what I usually do with my chic friends.
Tip #3 in making friends with girls: DON'T go to the bathroom together.
She looked up into my eyes - I was taller, definitely the alpha female - and kissed me.
Let me describe what it is like to kiss another female. They have a softer tongue, and are much more gentle in their approach to 'caressing' and making out. It lasted a while. I told her she was really pretty (which she was) and she said I was an amazing kisser. I even kissed her neck and shoulders, because chances are if she was anything like me she would like that. And boy, did she ever.
Tip #1 in making out with girls: Don't be a boring goldfish; use your mouth for other parts of the body. (Before you start grabbing them that is)
Needless to say, it was undoubtedly fun kissing another girl, but nowhere as fun as kissing a guy. In which case I would have gotten turned on. As you do when you kiss someone you fancy. In other words, I didn't 'feel' anything while it was happening.
Such a shame, being with girls would be so much easier...
During this makeout session one of my friends, Matt (or Karma, as he was in drag), not the most discreet person in the world, exclaimed: "LULU!! Since when did you become a rug muncher?!!" Oh dear. I told him, quite justifiably I thought, to shut up. He warned me not to mess with her, as she was a really nice person.
Geez. Now I know how guys feel when they hook up with girls.
At the end of the night there was the question of whether or not we would go home together. To be honest, the thought terrified me. But we exchanged numbers and said our goodbyes.
Now I am in a bit of a pickle. She is texting me, saying she had an amazing time with me that night. If I tell her the truth, she will be upset; if I don't do anything - a typical guy response - she will think I am not into her, and be upset. For now her texts remain unreplied to.
I could say that I don't think it should be taken any further as we both live in different cities. But seriously, I am not good at making up stories.
What on earth should I do??!!
P.S. I wouldn't write the experience off - every straight girl should try this. Without hurting the other girl's feelings, that is.